What Am I Doing?

As the world is thrown head-first into a situation for which we have no script it seems that a lucky few are ignorant and the rest of us are anxious. Anxiety hits me when I feel like I have no control over a situation, especially when the situation strongly affects my life.

When I talk about the lucky few who are ignorant I’m referring to the people that either lack the information or the good sense to realize that their decisions affect the ability of others to remain healthy. It’s about numbers. Normally if someone catches your cold the situation has a low probability of escalating. This case is a global escalation and being misinformed or irresponsible has consequences.

It’s also easy to let panic take over and make decisions that seem to make sense but don’t. For example, if there’s a possibility of responsibly exercising outside but you avoid it out of an abundance of caution, you’re not contributing to your immune system’s ability to do its job. Another example would be near-sighted public policy that catches people unprepared; what seems like a good idea right now results in a disaster some weeks later. The virus spreads quickly, but it still doesn’t spread quicker than bad ideas.

So, what am I doing? Or, at least, what am I trying to do about the anxiety? I’m trying to think. I’m trying to remain aware that my choices affect people’s lives. I’m trying to prioritize. I’m trying to limit the ideas that I share to only those that will be constructive, which is easier said than done. I’m trying to remain productive. I’m trying to accept that reality is different, so I must face it differently.

Understanding that I can’t control how government or other people face this is the first step in dealing with anxiety. It allows me to concentrate energy where it makes a difference and away from frustration. I have control over myself, I can be reliable for my family, and I can be a positive influence. I can stop whining and keep doing. I have to judge less and consider more.